Jambo,
Well Tanzania has been amazing so far. The African animals seem to be all about sex and violence; if they aren’t trying to eat something then they are trying to root it. I hope I don’t bring any of this behaviour home with me. Would be uncomfortable for everyone if I get my attack on the Christmas pudding all mixed up.
Anyway when we left you last time we had trekked with the gorillas and had found our way to Tanzania. But the start of our Tanzanian adventure was nothing short of frightening. One of the first things we saw, prowling in the hotel lift, was the leader of the middle aged American, kathmandu wearing, rocket camera sporting tour group from the Rwandan gorillas. A shot of fear ran down our spines – It felt like we were being hunted from country to country by a pride of pensioners. We consoled ourselves with the knowledge that dentures are unlikely to penetrate the skin, and we could just wait until they fell asleep at 5pm after too much pound cake at the buffet to make our escape.
So after finally shaking off the pensioners, it was off for first African safari experience at Lake Manyara. As you enter the gates to the park, swarms of baboons stop their grooming and scurry around the car. Once inside monkeys play on branches while giraffe clip along only to stop to munch on trees. But we had to wait until the end of the drive to find what we really wanted to see – a big herd of elephants. We had been excited to spot one in the distance but it soon became clear that he was part of a much bigger herd. As we stopped the car the whole herd slowly turned and headed in our direction. It was incredible having a herd of 15 elephants just clomp straight past the car almost close enough to touch. It took me back to that famous “all you can eat” restaurant called Sizzler where a table a bit too close to the cheesy bread would elicit a similar experience.
But our main safari was down into Ngorongoro crater, and this was nothing short of amazing. Within this massive sunken crater is every animal and ecosystem you could possibly imagine. There are expansive flat plains, forests, wetlands and freshwater pools. Lions, rhino, zebras and buffalo wander the fields while hippos splash about in the mud and elephants graze in the shallow marshes. You drive past herds of animals who barely give you a second glance as they continue on their way. It was like the Leyland Brothers mated with David Attenborough and created an African experience on speed.
Our first set of lions we saw were particularly impressive. We pulled up beside them which drew little more than a turn of the head from the big male. But once he saw he had a crowd, he raised himself to wander over to the female lion and mount her right in front of the car. Was almost like he was putting on a show, and was doing the lion equivalent of ‘look how easy it is for me to pick up chicks’. After about 30 seconds of action (maybe that length of time is acceptable after all?) he just flopped on his back on the grass. I was half expecting him to finish the session by pulling out a cigarette and start puffing away while texting pictures of his conquest to his male lion buddies.
The buffalo were also interesting. As the car pulls up, every one of them stop and just stare at you, and do not avert their eyes until you have moved out of their sight. You are faced with a group of 40 buffalo all just staring intently in your direction and watching your every move – like one of those dreams where you are standing in front of the whole staring class but suddenly discover you aren’t wearing pants (or maybe that is just a personal dream? Note to self: discuss childhood with my mum when I get home).
After driving around looking at animals for a few hours we were craving some action. And then we saw it – a commotion on the horizon as a sea of animals parted then surged frantically in different directions. We could just make out a pack of hyenas giving chase to a herd of zebras. The hunt was on.
The hyenas were after the baby zebra, but the adult zebras kept on blocking their attack path. But as they galloped across the road in front of us, the baby stumbled and a hyena grabbed it’s back leg. Krys barely had time to wail ‘poor baby zebra’ before it was set upon by a group of 20 hyenas. From that point it was just madness. Hyenas would emerge from the attacking pack, their whole heads covered in blood before trying to barge their way back in for more. I haven’t seen something attacked in such an unrelenting frenzy since I came home from work to discover a block of Tolberone Krys had hidden in the back of the cupboard. Like the Tolberone, after about a minute of mayhem there was not a single piece of evidence remaining on the ground of what had just occurred. The only evidence left was smeared around the mouth of the attackers (I must remember to wash my face before Krys gets home the next time I try to inhale a Toblerone).
We made it back to the lodge where I experienced my personal highlight of the trip so far. Our waiters name was ‘Goodlove’ (which would ordinarily be enough to make a great night – I should have thanked him for giving me the name for our 1st born son) but as we took our seats he said ‘do you know who you look like Sir – you look like Brad Pitt’. His flattery (and demonstrable lack of functional eyesight) was quickly overtaken by Krys laughing so hard I thought she was a chance to either wet her pants, fall off her chair, or both.
We had drunk a fair bit of wine, but managed to compose herself to look Goodlove in the eye, pout demurely and purr ‘look at my pout – don’t I look like Angelina Jolie’. Poor Goodlove looked confused, and responded with a timid ‘ok, if you like’ before backing away and sending someone else over to ask if we wanted the zucchini or tomato soup for entree. It was my turn to laugh so hard I almost blew out a lung.
We have since visited a Masai tribe village where after demonstrating their warrior skills, they then demonstrated their commerce skills by selling us a necklace for a price that could have bought 5 cows. But given their fearsome reputation, I giggled like a girl and handed over the cash rather than haggle. But more on that later.
Kwaheri.
Tranjalina Pitt
smallthoughts 